Hi Pip,
Thanks for your reply. A lot has happened since my last post. My father and I are feeling desperate and right are at the point where it feels that there is nothing in the system to help us. I have flown interstate to try and help dad and speak to mum in the hope that she will see reason and seek help. Unfortunately, she is in a pure state of mania and there is nothing that anyone can say or do to make her see reason. She says that there is nothing wrong and her "eyes are wide open for the first time" and she has "never been more sane in my life". When I arrived the other day she was at the doctor speaking to him about my father as she is insistent that he is the problem. I had already made an appointment to see their GP prior to flying up to see them, so was already going later that day. When she saw me she expressed her excitement to see me, however, she was extremely tangential. I helped her with the groceries at the supermarket and while there she started saying she has no more contact with her friend that she believes is stealing. I asked her what has happened since we last spoke and she looked at me in horror, shook her head, and said, "we can't talk about this now, why do you do this to me!?" There were several more conversations similar. She would say something to start a conversation and when I asked her a very general question back, she would switch her mood saying, "don't speak to me like that, what is wrong with you!" I am starting to worry that she may have some form of personality disorder or schizophrenia. Back at home, she continued in this manner, making conversation and then muttering response to me under her breath, and then yelling at me when I said, "pardon" politely, as I couldn't hear her. In the end a huge argument broke out, I told her I had multiple phone calls the past two weeks from family and friends worried about her not being herself and concerned about the "affair" she is telling everyone dad is having. She denied that she has told anyone that dad is having an affair and called all these people liars. She had been scammed the previous evening by a skincare company who charged her $2000 for what they claim is $5000 worth of skin care products. She also claims that the guy was trying to walk her to the car and apparently was trying to give her $50,000 of products but she refused it. She is having delusions of grandeur, and believes hat this company want her to be their poster girl and after the purchase of this skincare sent an email to a friend or hers who is on tv, and asked her when she is taking her to her directors and producers. She wrote this email at 12.30am and it was very manic and all over the place. Didn't make sense at all. She says she is sleeping better than ever, however, she emailed another friend three nights ago saying she hasn't slept in years. When I saw her GP, he asked me firstly what I thought was wrong with my mother and I said "some form of mania or bipolar disorder". He said "absolutely, there is no doubt about it". He has been trying to see any form of behaviour in her during her visits, where she could indicate self-harm or aggression to others, but she is just "so high" he can't schedule her for that. Scheduling her under "risk of reputation" he believes will be too difficult and with her behaviour at the moment isn't going to work due to the legalities surrounding it and having to involve a magistrate etc. He had discussed with mum that day that as a plan of action to "help dad", he thinks she needs to also see someone, so she has agreed to see her psychiatrist that she had several years ago when she was hospitalised for depression, and suggested she stay there for a week as a "holiday from dad". And then dad has agreed to go in after her. The psychiatrist has said he can't see her until Wednesday afternoon, however, we feel this is too late. I have only mentioned on this forum a small amount of the things my mother has done the last few days. Dad and I, and one her friends that is in regular contact with her, can't keep up with her. Dad and I don't know how much more we can take. I walked out on her yesterday morning as she had upset me so much and I just couldn't take it anymore. I feel I have been her punching bag for the last 10 years. She has always called me to complain about my sister and her husband, and my father. I have tried on several occasions to tell her that she should talk to someone professional, but she seems to be under the belief that she should be able to talk to me, and if I can't be there, I am the worst daughter in the world.
I called the SANE hotline again for some advice yesterday after I walked out on her, and felt a bit better after that. But then my mother started writing obscure text messages to her friend again and I was contacted by another friend regarding some weird emails she has written. All regarding paranoia of things being stolen and she has referenced times back 7 years ago.
After being told that her psychiatrist won't see her until Wednesday, (despite the GP calling multiple times and stressing the urgency), my dad and I are becoming desperate. I called our local crisis team, and explained the situation. They called my mother and spoke to her, she said she was "Very mad!" She said she is fine and doesn't have time for this nonsense, she has two beautiful grandchildren to live for and isn't a risk to herself, and is too busy this weekend for this nonsense as she has "trees being chopped down". The woman from the mental health team called me back and said she seemed OK, her speech was fine and not slurred in any way, however a bit tangential. She said based on that, there wasn't really anything she could do except write a report up and see what the rest of the team wants to do. She said if we get really concerned we could call 000, but doesn't know if this would work either as her speech on the phone seems fine. Unfortunately she is constantly flipping between pure mania and normality (although very briefly). Dad asked me to come home last night as I was going to stay with a friend instead after how my mother had treated me in the morning. He really needs me for his own sanity and a bit of "safety in numbers". I know my mother has no idea what she is saying and doesn't truly mean it, but I am really struggling as she has been so verbally abusive towards me over the years. Looking back I actually think she has had some form of mental illness or bipolar over the years and dad agrees and blames himself as he has tried to hide it and make excuses for her. We really are desperate and don't know if we can wait until Wednesday. She may not be a risk to herself, however she has flipped in the past and become a danger to herself. She is most definately a "risk to her reputation" as well as ours with what she is saying to other people. I just don't know what to do other than call 000 and have her carted off in an ambulance which I worry would destroy our relationship.
